Know How To Save A Life

WARNING: This blog post contains major spoilers for the film "It's A Wonderful Life."  

Gratitude leads us to prayer, which can help avoid disaster.  If we just realized the power of prayer, God could save us from so much.  And yet when we go through dire circumstances, we would do well to remember that Jesus suffered infinitely more than we ever have or ever will.  Knowing He is with us in our suffering, we can be encouraged in our faith, to pray boldly, with much gratitude.  

Receiving encouragement to gratitude and prayer, last night some of the other monks and I watched the 1946 film "It's A Wonderful Life."  Many know the film, and rightly so, as a call to gratitude, for those in our lives, for the many opportunities to love our neighbor.  However, in recent years I've come to see it also as a call to prayer.  

At the beginning of the film, celestial beings are discussing the plight of George Bailey, the main character in the film, who lives in the fictional town of Bedford Falls.  They are considering his current circumstances because so many people are sending up prayers for him.  They call Clarence, a junior angel, to familiarize him with George and his life before they send Clarence down to help George.  

Clarence learns that George has helped many people in life-altering, even life-saving ways.  George saved his younger, eight-year-old brother Harry from drowning.  Not too long later, he prevented his boss, the druggist Mr. Gower, from accidentally poisoning a young boy.  When George's father passed away, George postponed his plans to travel around the world so he could take over the Bailey Building and Loan Company, so that working-class people in town could get loans so they could live in respectable homes; if George had left, then the greedy Mr. Potter, the richest man in town, would have gotten rid of the Bailey business, forcing people to live in substandard housing.  Once Harry returned from college, he was married, with a lucrative job offer from his new father-in-law, so he didn't take over the Building and Loan Company.  George once again felt stuck, but in time he married beautiful, devoted Mary, and with more time, they had four kids.  

Coming to the end of the present day in the film, we find ourselves just before Harry's return home from the Second World War.  At that point, George's Uncle Billy misplaced eight thousand dollars, which would be over one hundred thousand dollars today.  George went home to Mary and his children, and was so disturbed that when he rushed out of the house, Mary picked up the telephone to alert many people that George was in trouble.  Her children were already gathered around her, asking her if they should pray for their father.  Their mother Mary replied that, yes, they should pray very hard.  George was so distraught that he was seriously considering committing suicide, and so Clarence is sent to save George.  

George discontentedly mutters that it would have been better if he had never been born.  Clarence consults with his superiors, and George's wish is granted.  Clarence shows George what would have happened if he had never been born.  

First he sees that his favorite neighborhood bar, where his friends had gently and tenderly cared for him, has become a business where his one friend Nick now works as a cold, heartless, cruel bartender.  In walks Mr. Gower, who, George learns, spent twenty years in prison, since George wasn't there to prevent him from inadvertently poisoning the young boy.  

Once he gets back to the center of town, George sees the town has been transformed for the worse.  It's no longer called Bedford Falls; now it's Pottersville, since Potter has totally taken it over.  Not only is the Building and Loan Company long gone, but debauchery is rampant; as George looks on, one of his former childhood friends, now belligerent and combative, is being dragged into a police vehicle.  He hails the cab his former friend Ernie is driving; once he's in it, Ernie tells him he's living in a slum, since the lovely home George had made possible through his loan has never existed.  Later George learns Uncle Billy was committed to an insane asylum when he lost his business.  His own mother doesn't recognize him since she never gave birth to him; she is cold and hardened, with none of the warmth and tenderness he had formerly received from her.  

Retreating from the center of town, George goes out and attempts to see the numerous homes he had made possible, which, of course, are not there; instead he finds a cemetery.  In it he sees the grave of his brother Harry.  George declares it's a lie, that Harry Bailey went to war, shot down two enemy planes that were about to crash into two transports, and thus saved many lives.  Clarence explains that Harry wasn't there to save them, since George hadn't been there to save Harry.  Then Clarence says to George, "You see, George, you really had a wonderful life."  Still George persists; he urges out of Clarence the whereabouts of Mary, whom he finds, and who, of course, also does not recognize him.  George rushes back to the bridge where he had been considering committing suicide, but now he is begging God, earnestly telling God that he wants to live again, desperately imploring God to let him live again.  Grateful, George is restored to life.  

We can fail to appreciate God's many blessings.  We can focus on what we don't have instead of what do we have.  Yet when we pay attention to what we do have, then we are grateful.  

Gratitude gives birth to generosity.  Gratitude feeds compassion.  If we are grateful, we'll take care of those in our lives.  When others are in need, since we are grateful, we'll help them.  

To recognize the need of another person, we need to keep our eyes open.  Then we need to embrace the duty of the present moment.  

I have learned these lessons in tragic ways.  Ten years ago I was in a park with a group of friends.  At one point I was walking along with Bob, who was the friend of a friend.  He was silent.  I asked him how he was.  Literally, never at any other point in my life have I ever felt such unspoken darkness from another human being.  He did not reply.  A few days later I heard that he had committed suicide.  

In the many e-mails that were exchanged in our social circle as we struggled with the reality that Bob had taken his own life, a friend of mine asked, "Where was Clarence?"  He was referring to the guardian angel in the movie "It's A Wonderful Life," who appeared to save George Bailey from committing suicide.  I sent a group e-mail to those in our social circle, pointing out that in that movie, many people were praying for George.  In contrast, I asked how many of us had been praying for Bob before he committed suicide.  A crowd was storming Heaven on behalf of George Bailey because his wife Mary had urged them to pray for him; I had reason to know that Bob was in trouble, but I did and said nothing.  

On the Feast Day of the Guardian Angels, back on October 2 this year, this blog post had occurred to me, yet I said nothing.  Now I am conveying it to you.  Yes, there are angels.  Yes, they have jobs to do.  We also have jobs to do.  One of our jobs is to pray.  Prayer is power.  Power is exerted when it is used.  If you don't use your hand to pick up a telephone off of a table, it remains on the table; if someone else doesn't come along and hand it to you, you won't get it.  If you don't pray, and if no one else does, no request is made.  

We are called to care for each other, including by praying for each other.  We are not without models to follow.  Jesus came and cared for us.  We follow Him by caring for each other.  

Some of us could point out that we have not been well taught in caring for each other since we have not had exemplary families.  Earlier this year I met a woman who asked me how to cope with a parent who inflicted trauma and who continues to inflict trauma.  Twenty years ago when I made a new friend, she told me that as a young girl, she watched until her father beat her mother until her mother was bloody.  

Yet when we have been mistreated, we do well to keep in mind that often those who have abused others were themselves gravely injured.  A couple days ago I received a letter from someone I met years ago.  Back soon after I met him, repeatedly I heard that he hit his cohabitant very hard.  Then in this letter from him last week, he told me that he is still grappling with the reality that his father killed his mother.  

Knowing of his emotional and psychological wounds, I became compassionate toward him.  Learning of his deep scars, I was brought out of myself and into communion with him.  

We are called to solidarity with our neighbors in their suffering.  They are not to be left alone, and we must remember we are not alone in our tribulations, when we feel tortured and agonized.  In Jesus, Mary and Joseph we not only find our models.  In them we also find spiritual family members who share and feel our pain because they too felt such anguish.  

In Mary, Joseph and all the Saints, we find our spiritual family members who are waiting for us to call out.  If we simply ask them to intercede with Our Father in Heaven and with His Son Jesus, they will pray for us and thus show us the love they have for us as our spiritual family members.  

A couple days ago we celebrated the Feast of the Holy Family, the family of Jesus, Mary and Joseph.  That day at Mass we heard of Mary and Joseph taking Jesus to the Temple to present Him to the Lord God.  At the Presentation, Simeon, an elderly devout man, prophesied that Jesus was destined for the fall and the rise of many, and that a sword would pierce Mary's soul too.*  A sword pierced Mary's soul partly because her Son, though he would never sin, was put to death.  He was condemned to death although He was innocent.  

Jesus stands with those who are murdered yet are guiltless.  Today we honor the Feast of the Holy Innocents, those boys two years old and younger in Bethlehem, who King Herod ordered murdered, as he attempted to wipe out Jesus, who had been born in Bethlehem, The One who would become King.**    

It is often asked how God can exist when innocent people are victims of tragedies.  When we are crying out in disbelief over how God can allow such catastrophes to occur, let us not doubt the love of God.  God let His own innocent Son die.  God let His guiltless Son die to save us, because God infinitely loves us.  God loves us limitlessly because God made an infinite sacrifice for us: God, the Divine, is infinite; God sacrificed His Son, who is Divine and thus infinite, for us; God's sacrifice for us is infinite and never-ending.  

God's love is greater than any catastrophe that befalls us.  The Holy Innocents died as King Herod ordered their massacre.  God gives us free will.  Unfortunately, some people misuse the free will God has given us.  God takes the risk, that free will might be used inappropriately, because God loves us.  Love does not force itself on another.  

God also takes the chance of the improper use of free will because tremendous good can ultimately come out of this situation.  Here we delve into mysteries which will not be fully revealed to us this side of Heaven.  For now we are called to trust that through these perilous waters we will be strengthened.  Now we see what we are; what we will be has not yet been revealed to us.***    

In the end it comes down to what we believe.  Belief is crucial.  What you believe determines what you pray.  What you pray decides the result.  We reap what we sow.  

When we fail to pray, tragedy unfolds.  By contrast, we avert tremendous suffering when we pray.  

In our prayer, or lack of prayer, we determine the course of events.  Simply in being grateful, we are transformed.  Having become grateful, we are more likely to pray.  Being more prone to pray, we are more likely to be turning to God in all circumstances, including in rather trying situations.  Turning to God, and enlisting others to petition God, together through our prayer God delivers us.  God transforms the world through our prayer.  

* Luke 2:22-35 

** Matthew 2:16 

*** 1 John 3:2 

Unto You A Child Is Born

Unto you a child is born.*  He is here, with us always.**  

He was born in a stable two thousand years ago.***  Now He knocks at the doors of our hearts, asking us to grant Him entry.****  God knocks at the doors of our hearts, respecting our free will, never forcing Himself upon us.  

God invites us to be co-creators with Him.  He does not force us to decide in a particular way.  He leaves it up to us.  

We will become who God made us to be to the extent we cooperate with grace.*****  We will become our true selves insofar as we open our hearts to God.  

We can become much more than we have ever been.  God awaits our response to His invitation.  

* Isaiah 9:5; Luke 2:11 

** Matthew 28:20 

*** Luke 2:7  

**** Revelation 3:20  

***** Catechism of the Catholic Church. (Liguori, MO: Liguori Publications, 1994), 1996.  

Invited To Step Outside Of Ourselves

God corrects us since we are ignorant.  God shows us what we do not want to see.  In what God shows us, our misperceptions are corrected so that we see with clear vision.  

We have preconceptions of who God is.  In our mind's eye, we have picture of what we believe God looks like.  Similarly, we can have an idea of the appearance of Mary, the mother of Jesus.  What we imagine is not necessarily accurate.  God sets us straight so we see right again.  

We get an inkling of such correction from Our Lady of Guadalupe, who appeared in 1531 to Saint Juan Diego Cuauhtlatoatzin, a native peasant, on Tepeyac Hill in what is present-day Mexico.  After initially coming to him a few times on that hill, later he went before the bishop to convey her request that a shrine be built there, so that people could go there to receive grace.  The bishop told Juan Diego that he needed a sign to confirm that the apparition truly was Our Blessed Mother Mary.  When Juan Diego, at Our Blessed Mother's direction, returned to the bishop with flowers from Tepeyac Hill even though it was winter, upon Juan Diego opening his tilma, or his mantle, and letting the flowers fall to the ground, upon his tilma was impressed an image of Our Lady of Guadalupe.  

Our Lady of Guadalupe is depicted on the tilma as having the features of a woman native to the land in which she appeared.  Europeans, only having arrived in the Americas less than forty years earlier, only had seen such native people for the first time a few decades before she appeared to Saint Juan Diego.  For centuries Europeans likely had been envisioning Our Blessed Mother Mary as not looking like she appeared to Juan Diego.  

Europeans were coming to the Americas to evangelize the native peoples, having a certain idea of what Our Blessed Mother Mary looked like.  As it turned out, the native people seemed to have evangelized the arriving Europeans, who were probably corrected in their misconceptions of the certainty of the appearance of Our Blessed Mother Mary.  

We can be convinced we have something to show to our neighbor, when in fact our neighbor has something to show us, when God wants to show us something through our neighbor.  We can be sure we are the teachers, when in fact we are the students.  The image of Our Lady of Guadalupe is a call to humility.  

In this summons to humility, God guides us to see our neighbor with fresh eyes, casting aside our inaccurate perceptions of our neighbor.  So often we avoid seeing our neighbors for who and what they truly are.  God is in our neighbor, but we can refuse to see God in our neighbor.  

Jesus told us that we find Him in those of the least among us.*  Jesus is in the impoverished person who comes to us.  When the bishop received the poor man Juan Diego, he welcomed Jesus.  When we welcome our neighbor into our hearts, we open our hearts to Jesus.  

What we do to our neighbor, we do to Jesus.  When we subject our neighbor to racism, we are not only disrespecting our neighbor, we are also rejecting Jesus, who is in our neighbor.  

When we refuse to open our hearts to our neighbors, we close our hearts to God.  In the one in front of us who is different from us, we receive a call to open our hearts, to see anew, to see as God wants us to see.  

We receive this summons to see with new eyes as we gaze upon Our Lady of Guadalupe.  By appearing as a native, she challenged the assumptions of the Europeans who likely did not expect her appearance to be as it was.  

In Our Lady of Guadalupe, we see a rebuke of racism.  In her we see a call to welcome those who are different from us, to listen to them, to pay attention to them, to see them with fresh eyes.  As we consider her, we are invited to learn from those who are different from us.  

Race is an invitation to step outside of ourselves.  When we are with someone of another race, God wants to teach us through that person.  If we are racist, we reject God's advances.  As we open our hearts to someone of another race, we open our hearts to God.  

* Matthew 25:40,45  

Stay Awake Because You Do Not Know The Day Or The Hour

Today I feel as if the Gospel echoes the urgency my soul has felt for years.  For years I feel I have been reminded of the truth I have heard today.  

Today at Mass we heard that 

Jesus said to his disciples: 
“Be watchful! Be alert!  
You do not know when the time will come.  
It is like a man traveling abroad.  
He leaves home and places his servants in charge, 
each with his own work, 
and orders the gatekeeper to be on the watch.  
Watch, therefore; 
you do not know when the Lord of the house is coming, 
whether in the evening, or at midnight, 
or at cockcrow, or in the morning.  
May he not come suddenly and find you sleeping.  
What I say to you, I say to all: ‘Watch!’”*    

After Mass today, Father Isaiah pointed out to me that this Gospel passage could be calling us to be vigilant so we recognize Jesus when He comes to us in our daily lives.  On any given day, we may cross paths with a homeless person; we do well to remain alert so we see Jesus in that poor person in front of us.**  

Of course in these Gospel verses Jesus is telling us that we do not know the day or the hour when He will come again, in His Second Coming.  We do not want to be unprepared when He returns, but instead we want to be ready for his arrival.  

Most often when I hear these Scripture verses, I am reminded I do not know when I will be called from this life to the next.  I have taken this directive from Jesus as an urgent call to attend to the duty of the present moment, to be constantly striving to love God and my neighbor, since at any given moment, this life might be about to end.  

Over and over in my life I have been reminded of the truth that I do not know when my time will come.  For many years now, my friends and friends of friends have passed away having had little or no warning.  They were not expecting death, yet at times it came unannounced, probably coming earlier than they had been anticipating.  

A college classmate of mine, Chris, once he was in his mid-twenties, died from complications related to cancer.  A few years later, Liz, a dear mentor and co-worker, in her late thirties had a headache at work one day; that night she expired from a cerebral hemorrhage.  Less than a half dozen years later, another co-worker in his late forties got up one morning and very soon thereafter suddenly collapsed from a fatal heart attack.  Around the same time, a friend of a friend, in his early fifties died during the course of an operation.  About a half dozen years later, another friend of a friend, Eric, in his forties lost a battle with brain cancer.  Around the same time, Karen, a former co-worker in her late fifties or early sixties passed away after only a day or two of any evident health challenge.  

Over and over I have been reminded that I do not know when my time will come.  Today in my heart, mind and soul is echoing the reminder of today's Gospel that has been presented to me repeatedly during my life.  And so, what has been reinforced in my soul I say to you: Be watchful, be alert, since you do not know when the time will come.  

* Mark 13:33-37 

** Matthew 25:40,45 

Thank God Constantly For The Love God Shows Us Through Our Faith

Abundance flows in all our steps.  Thank God in all circumstances,* since God's blessings endlessly proliferate.  

On Thanksgiving Day, in his homily Father Cyprian noted that we can be thankful in various ways.  We can be grateful that worse circumstances have not befallen us.  Right now, thanks be to God that the coronavirus is before us and not anything more devastating, nor an additional, much more threatening challenge; this spiritual dynamic is easy to perceive here at the hermitage, given how, thanks be to God, no one here was injured during the recent wildfire, nor how any structures were damaged in that fire which erupted in the midst of the coronavirus.  

In his homily, Father Cyprian also noted that in a much more profound sense we can thank God for the spiritual blessings He bestows on us.  Thanks be to God that He gives us faith in Him.  Through this faith, God strengthens us in the hope we have in His promise of what is to come.  God motivates us through this faith to love Him** and to love one another.***  Having faith, we are empowered by God to open our hearts to receive His love He pours into our hearts through the Holy Spirit.****

As we open our hearts to God, we are grateful to God that our hearts are open.  Although current circumstances may feel challenging, thank God for what is happening right now.  Often we are not able to see the good that God is working through all that is happening right now, the good that He works for all who love Him.*****  Trust is an indispensable bulwark to going forward in faith in God.  

What do we think is happening right now?  There is what is happening that we cannot see.  There is what we do, in which we can make seen the unseen.  In our choices, we can be the pathways through which God makes manifest that which could not be seen, yet which can be seen if we consent to cooperate.  If we embrace the faith God has given us, God makes His love manifest through us, and thus we give constant thanks to God.  

* 1 Thessalonians 5:18 

** Deuteronomy 6:5; Deuteronomy 10:12; Matthew 22:37; Mark 12:30; Luke 10:27 

*** Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14 

**** Romans 5:5 

***** Romans 8:28 

God Does Much With The Faith He Gives Us

 The Kingdom of God is like a mustard seed, small when it is sown, but when it is fully grown, it becomes a large bush providing much shelter.  The Kingdom of God is like yeast mixed with flour so that it causes bread to rise.*    

We might think it seems like God is not working through us.  Faith is a seed.  Faith is like yeast.  If we believe, going forward trusting in God, embracing the faith God gives us, God can feed many through the bread God makes with our faith.  

* Luke 13:18-21  

Blessed Are The Poor In Spirit

Blessed are the poor in spirit.*  If we are poor this way, God lives in us.  God is all we need, and we have all we need.  Satisfied, we rest content and glory in our littleness, since through it God is glorified.  

Today at Mass we heard the testimony of Job.  As we well know, Job had lost everything.  As we are less aware, Job was dwelling in that place of confidence in God, even in the midst of disaster.  

Job seemed to have nothing.  Having lost all that could be seen, Job faced the most fundamental choice.  Embracing his nothingness, his inability to help himself, Job expressed his assurance as he adored God.  

Sure of who God is, Job proclaimed, "I know my Redeemer lives."**  Even in the midst of what seems to be total loss, Job declared his unshaken faith in God.  

Today at Mass, Father Cyprian said that Job lived in spiritual poverty, just as did Saint Therese of Lisieux, whose feast day we celebrate today.  Both realized in darkness, we are blessed if we are poor in spirit.  

For months at the end of her life, Saint Therese of Lisieux related the darkness that mocked her, telling her after death it would be still darker.  Yet Therese, in her littleness, went on in faith in God.  

God calls us to embrace our littleness.  Therese went further, writing, "What pleases Him is that He sees me loving littleness and poverty."***  As we find ourselves poor, we can love how we must rely on Him.  

If we love how God made us, poor and little, we embrace the will of God.  If we welcome what others might see as only tragic events, we can ever more become the children trusting in God He made us to be.  

In the midst of the coronavirus, beset by fire, we can accept what our present circumstances have to teach us.  Like little children, we can trust that Our Father is loving us, since He is love.****  

* Matthew 5:3 

** Job 19:25 

*** "The Story Of A Soul," Saint Therese of Lisieux.   

**** 1 John 4:8,16 

In All Things God Loves Us, So Give Thanks

We can always be receiving, if our hearts are open to love.  If we open our hearts, we can see the love being extended to us.  

A woman came into the bookstore this month.  She helps to see the light.  She noted if the coronavirus hadn't forced us into lockdown, she and her husband would not have been around their daughter to notice her mental health struggles.  With the virus come what seem like restrictions.  Maybe they are more like guideposts and life preservers.  

This woman has been guided into gratitude.  She is grateful for the additional time with her husband and her daughter.  She is even more thankful that this additional time has led her and her husband to help their daughter, perhaps averting a tragedy.  

Give thanks for a virus, for a fire, and for all things.*  Perhaps some people find it difficult to always thank God for all God sends us.  Sometimes we will see benefits God is giving us.  Sometimes we will not see how, if we but love God, God is working a virus, a fire, and all for our good.**  

God is always giving to us, since God is love.***  If we truly believe God is love, we will thank God for all things.  

* 1 Thessalonians 5:18 

** Romans 8:28 

*** 1 John 4:8,16

Look At What Burns Inside Us

On Wednesday last week, most of us monks returned here to the hermitage after being evacuated last month due to a wildfire.  All monks, all staff and all other residents of the hermitage are uninjured, thanks be to God, and due to the vigilant hard work of firefighters, monks and hermitage staff.  No buildings at the hermitage were damaged.  Some of the land at the hermitage burned, some due to the fire spreading, some under controlled burns prudently set by firefighters to prevent the fire from proceeding further.  

However, the fire station about two miles away--as the crow flies--did not hold up.  As firefighters were struggling to contain the blaze, it overwhelmed them.  They sheltered under their fire blankets.  Although they were rescued, and even the one firefighter who had been in critical condition recovered, thanks be to God, the fire station was destroyed by the roaring flames.  

We construct edifices, becoming confident of how they will be bulwarks that will save us from ruin.  From what are we protecting ourselves?  To achieve the purpose we intend, what we construct must be stronger than what we believe threatens us.  Can we really protect ourselves?  Are we supposed to protect ourselves, or make ourselves more vulnerable?  By looking at our deficiencies, then we can address how we need to improve and so become who we are meant to be.  

We are invited into awareness of who we are supposed to be when we are confronted by what threatens us.  These past days, fires have been breaking out in places far and wide.  They not only wreak destruction; they also call us to look at why they have broken out at all.  They call to us to examine ourselves and see how we have been contributing to the crisis which has been endangering our lives.  

Firestorms of violence have erupted these past days.  George Floyd and Daniel Prude were killed by police officers; it is easy to imagine how Mr. Floyd and Mr. Prude could have been taken into custody more prudently than they were actually subdued.  If I see another person as a threat, what does that perception say about me?  It is vital to be aware of how we perceive another person: our perceptions of that person will guide how we treat them.  

We can build fortresses of unwarranted assumptions about other people, assumptions we make because we feel they threaten our safety, and therefore that they will harm us.  It is not that much further to conclude that we must then attack those other persons before they hurt us.  We can easily do so without considering that they have been getting abused for years, decades, even centuries; we can proceed to continue such abuse without being aware we are perpetuating the very mistreatment we have condemned.  

Convinced we need to protect ourselves, those we hurt sometimes quite reasonably conclude that they would do well to protect themselves from us.  In our own eyes, we seem justified; in others' eyes, we may seem anything but justified, but rather we might seem like preemptive aggressors.  

When we assume we must shield ourselves from harm, we are acting from insecurity.  Why are we not confident in who we are?  Not accepting who we are, feeling we are inadequate, we lash out by attacking others.  

From this vantage point then, can we ever truly protect ourselves?  Often when we find supposed problems in other people, we are merely projecting our own insecurities onto them.  If the deficiencies are to be found in ourselves, then no amount of trying to extinguish perceived flaws in others will ever help us feel secure.  

Indeed, if we are somehow falling short, we are the ones who are to look at ourselves.  We need to take stock of what is in us that makes us uncomfortable, that leads us to feel inadequate and squirm because we feel we do not measure up to what we want to be or to how we feel we should be.  As we embrace this duty, necessarily we are being called to become vulnerable.  Unfortunately, rather than accept this duty, some people are so insecure that they lash out against others, sometimes violently so.  

Yet the fundamental question remains for each and every one of us.  When we are faced with the reality that we fall short somehow of being how we would like to be, that we are not as virile, not as strong, not as intelligent, not as resilient as we would like to be, that we are not as loved, admired or imitated as we would like, then we are presented with the decision whether we take out our dissatisfaction on those around us, or whether we examine why we are not closer to our ideals, and how we can achieve those aims.  

After the visible fires were extinguished, fires still broke out.  How did these fires erupt seemingly without any external cause?  The roots of trees were burning.  Due to the devastation on the inside, suddenly the outside became consumed through the intense heat that was brimming within.  

Each and every one of us needs to carefully consider the attitudes, preconceptions and prejudices that we mistakenly believe keep us safe, but which in fact merely harbor hostility that seems to be simmering, that, unchecked and unaddressed, may boil over into violence toward our neighbor.  If we are convinced we have no prejudices, whether with race or with some other concern, it is prudent to consult sources specially designed for that purpose, to help us look for a more objective answer, unsettling as it may be.*  

As we conduct this crucial self-examination, we lay bare the core of our hearts.  We aspire to open up to the light of day whatever stands in the way of our loving our neighbor.  Painful as it is, we are called to die to all that is in us which we feel protects us, but will not save us, but only imperil us and our neighbor.  The grain of our ego having fallen into the ground and died, then love can yield a rich harvest.**    

Love springs up in abundance when all opposed to love in us dies.  When fire ravages a forest, much carbon is left in the soil, which tremendously fuels new plant growth.  As we die to that in us which impedes the free flow of love through us, then God pours into our hearts His love through the Holy Spirit.***  For this love to be poured into our hearts, we must cultivate our hearts for love.  

To love our neighbor, we must love ourselves.  To love ourselves, we must be honest with ourselves.  To love our neighbor, we must see ourselves as we really are.  Once we are looking at ourselves with all honesty, then we can consciously work to eliminate all that stands in the way of love.  As we get out of the way, we make way for love.  

* https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/ 

** John 12:24 

*** Romans 5:5 

Let The Dead Wood Be Cleared

In the last week over 11,000 flashes of lightning have ignited over 500 fires in California.  On Tuesday night this week, a fire started burning a dozen miles north of the hermitage; it's now a couple of miles from the hermitage.  

This particular fire is now 10% contained.  Federal and state firefighters are hard at work at the hermitage, bulldozing and clearing brush, creating fire breaks.  

A couple of days ago some monks and I were evacuated to our other monastery south in San Luis Obispo.  That same day, some of our other monks went to our other monastery north in Berkeley.  Earlier in the week, some of our monks had already come down to the monastery in San Luis Obispo.  

Into my head about this fire, and all of these fires burning right now, comes the same question that has been coming into my head about the coronavirus.  What is God calling to us in the midst of these challenges?  

Certainly let's pray for these fires to be extinguished quickly with little loss of life and property.  Yet if that's all we request of God, how much better off will we be?  

How is God calling us to pray, to learn and to grow as a result of these fires, the coronavirus and all of our tribulations we endure?  Let's take these trials, and all that afflicts us, as opportunities for more closely attuning to what God is saying to us.  

Fire is greatly stoked through the dead wood that has been lying piled up on the forest floor.  All that doesn't feed us, that we don't clear away, is fuel for what seeks to consume us.  

If we remove from ourselves what should die, then we can progress toward God.  As the impediments to our growth are extricated from us, we make the room in ourselves for our souls to breathe, to excise obstacles to doing God's will.  

If we are willing, God can use what seems like tragedy to transform us.  Let us embrace our current circumstances to become who God made us to be.  Amen.  

Rise Above By Remaining In Jesus

Earlier this week we heard at Mass how Jesus meets us in the challenges we face.  He invites us, through Him, to rise above what would drag us down.  

In the Gospel that day, we were reminded that 

Jesus made the disciples get into a boat

and precede Him to the other side of the sea, 

while He dismissed the crowds.  

After doing so, He went up on the mountain by Himself to pray.  

When it was evening He was there alone.  

Meanwhile the boat, already a few miles offshore, 

was being tossed about by the waves, for the wind was against it.  

During the fourth watch of the night, 

He came toward them, walking on the sea.  

When the disciples saw Him walking on the sea 

they were terrified.  

"It's a ghost," they said, and they cried out in fear.  

At once Jesus spoke to them, "Take courage, it is I; 

do not be afraid."  

Peter said to Him in reply, "Lord, if it is you, 

command me to come to You on the water."  

He said, "Come."  

But when he saw how strong the wind was 

he became frightened; 

and, beginning to sink, he cried out, "Lord, save me!"  

Immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and caught him, 

and said to him, "O you of little faith, why did you doubt?"  

After they got into the boat, the wind died down.  

Those who were in the boat did Him homage, saying, 

"Truly, You Are the Son of God."  

After making the crossing, they came to land at Gennesaret.  

When the men of that place recognized Him, 

they sent word to all the surrounding country.  

People brought to Him all those who were sick

and begged Him 

that they might touch only the tassel on His cloak, 

and as many as touched it were healed.*  

Jesus sent the disciples out onto the sea.  God knows what is going to happen.  God lets us go through trials.  We go through fire and water.**  Through tribulation we are tested.  At times we are refined, but not like silver, rather in a furnace of affliction.***  At other times, God tries us as silver is tried in fire,**** polishes us like silver, to become ever more beautiful.  In all that tries us, God is giving us oil to make our faces shine.*****  Through all that tests us, God makes us more luminous because God is strengthening us. In giving us the grace to do what we could not do ourselves, God is thus glorified.  As God is glorified through us, we become more beautiful, because we are reflecting the magnificence of God.  

Of course the disciples probably were not thinking thus in the midst of their rowing across the sea as they were being tossed by the waves.  So often, we do not think about the benefits God is bestowing on us as we are enduring hardship.  

When the disciples saw Jesus, they fearfully cried out.  Indeed, we can become so absorbed in the struggle that we do not even recognize Jesus, that we forget that Jesus is with us always.******  

Jesus is not only there with us every moment as we are being tested; He is there for us to step toward Him in faith, as frightening and impossible as that may seem to us through our impaired vision.  He bids us come to Him as He bid Peter to come to Him.  

Peter sank because he took his eyes off Jesus.  He started focusing on the wind instead of on Jesus, and consequently he gave into fear.  When we take our eyes off of Jesus, we sink.  

Jesus wants us to rise above what would drag us down, to remain above it all by keeping focused on Him, by fixing our attention so much on Him that we remain in Him and He remains in us.*******  If we remain in Him and He remains in us, we will stay above all that would pull us down since we totally trust in Him.  

We remain in Him, we abide in Him and He abides in us, when we live in faith.  If we embrace the gift of faith that God has planted in us, we will remain above all that would drag us down.  

In the midst of these challenging days of the coronavirus, how are we responding?  Someone asked me if I have been praying for a cure for the coronavirus.  Sure, it's well and good to pray for a cure for the coronavirus and for all that threatens our physical health.  

However, if all we do is pray for a medical cure, it's tantamount to saying to God only, "God, get me out of this situation that is such a problem."  It's implicitly telling God that we're not interested in how God wants us to learn and grow through the coronavirus.  

We can only cry out for God to catch us so we don't sink.  When waves threaten to drown us, we can pray not only that we not be engulfed by the waves.  Frankly, though, if we nurture and cultivate the gift of faith that God has given us, we're not going to be desperately crying out to God.  If we embrace the gift of faith that God has given us, we're going to be calmly and confidently turning to God for the strengthening and sustenance and grace that we're sure God is going to give us, and that God is already giving us.  

We can prepare for such challenging times in advance.  We can decide ahead of time how we want to respond.  We can visualize in our mind's eye being in the midst of a storm and feeling assured of God's support of us.  We can envision the storm raging around us as we serenely step toward Jesus, having already chosen to keep our eyes on Jesus.  

We turn to God.  God reaches to us.  God holds us up.  

* Matthew 14:22-36 

** Psalm 66:12 

*** Isaiah 48:10 
****Psalm 66:10 

***** Psalm 104:15 

****** Matthew 28:20 

******* John 15:4, 5, 6, 7 

Give Them Something To Eat Yourselves

God feeds us.  We become more.  Through us God feeds our neighbor.  

We see pain and feel it.  God feels it.  

We cry out, praying to God.  God hears us.  

We can get stuck crying out.  We are empowered to do more.  God wishes more done in us.

We call out.  Yet God seeks more from us.  We seek food.  God wants us feeding each other.  

In today's Gospel, we hear that, when Jesus received the news that John the Baptist had been beheaded, 

he withdrew in a boat to a deserted place by himself.
The crowds heard of this and followed him on foot from their towns.
When he disembarked and saw the vast crowd,
his heart was moved with pity for them, and he cured their sick.
When it was evening, the disciples approached him and said,
“This is a deserted place and it is already late;
dismiss the crowds so that they can go to the villages
and buy food for themselves.”
Jesus said to them, “There is no need for them to go away;
give them some food yourselves.”
But they said to him,
“Five loaves and two fish are all we have here.”
Then he said, “Bring them here to me,”
and he ordered the crowds to sit down on the grass.
Taking the five loaves and the two fish, and looking up to Heaven,
he said the blessing, broke the loaves,
and gave them to the disciples,
who in turn gave them to the crowds.
They all ate and were satisfied,
and they picked up the fragments left over—
twelve wicker baskets full.
Those who ate were about five thousand men,
not counting women and children.*  

The disciples realized the need of the crowds.  The disciples asked Jesus to send the crowds away so they could go get something to eat.  The disciples saw, but with their physical senses and functions, rather than with the eyes of faith.  The disciples did not realize how Jesus wished to feed the crowds.  The disciples did not realize Jesus wanted to feed them as well as the crowds.  

Jesus proceeded to multiply the five loaves of bread and the two fish, so that the thousands were fed with what at first seemed to be so little food.  In the multiplication of the loaves and the fishes, we see a prefiguring of the Eucharist, of Jesus' giving of Himself, His sacrifice of Himself.**  

When the disciples asked Jesus to send the crowds away, He told the disciples to give the crowds something to eat themselves.  Jesus wanted to feed the crowds through the faith of the disciples.  

In our faith, we feed each other.  When we embrace our faith, God works through us.  Jesus could have said to the disciples, "Give them something to eat: yourselves."  

When we give of ourselves, we feed our neighbor.  When we offer ourselves as sacrifices, we join our sacrifice with the sacrifice of Jesus.  In the Eucharist, the sacrifice of Christ becomes also the sacrifice of the members of the Body of Christ.***  

When we partake of the Body and the Blood of Christ, we become what we receive.****  When we receive the Eucharist, we become Eucharist.  Having become Eucharist, we can be Eucharist to each other.  Jesus, in us, feeds our neighbor through us.  

As we embrace this mystery, we consent to the growth of the faith in us.  As we see with the eyes of faith, we invite God to work through us.  

Jesus was not telling the disciples not to bother him, to give the crowds something to eat themselves since He was not going to give the crowds something to eat.  Nor was He going to simply give the crowds something to eat.  

Rather Jesus wanted not only to feed the crowds with food, but feed the faith of those present.  He was beginning to tell us that we feed each other when we give of ourselves.  

Right now many people are starving, some for food.  Others are starving because they feel discouraged or hopeless in the face of the challenges that the coronavirus has brought, social distancing, lockdown, loss of income, inability to pay bills, including rent, lack of money to buy food, not being able to visit sick family members and friends.  

In your faith, in the faith that God has given you, you can help provide the hope that some need.  Through your faith, you can strengthen the weak, those who are collapsing on the way.  You can be given; you can be Eucharist to your neighbor.  God can give life through you.  

* Matthew 14:13-21

** The Catechism of the Catholic Church 1335.  

*** The Catechism of the Catholic Church 1368.  
**** Saint Pope Leo the Great, Sermo 12 de Passione, 3, 6-7, PL 54, 355-357.  

Let Us Let God Remake Us

Today in his homily Fr. Cyprian really got to the core of my basic orientation toward the coronavirus. Indeed, when the idea came into my head to blog expounding a little on what he'd said in his sermon, I stopped to consider that perhaps he'd already fully expressed it.  

Fr. Cyprian referred back to the first reading we heard at Mass tonight.  In that reading, we heard 

This word came to Jeremiah from the LORD:
Rise up, be off to the potter’s house;
there I will give you my message.
I went down to the potter’s house and there he was,
working at the wheel.
Whenever the object of clay which he was making
turned out badly in his hand,
he tried again,
making of the clay another object of whatever sort he pleased.
Then the word of the LORD came to me:
Can I not do to you, house of Israel,
as this potter has done? says the LORD.
Indeed, like clay in the hand of the potter,
so are you in my hand, house of Israel.*  

Fr. Cyprian explained that perhaps God is trying to remake us now.  Maybe we are being called right now to unlearn maladaptive habits which have become very comfortable.  Just because we're used to a certain way of thinking or acting, it doesn't mean it serves us well.  

Fr. Cyprian described that when we're addicted, we are overflowing with our addictions.  He continued that recovering addicts are told to visualize their addictions as being in a cup.  They're told to overturn the cup and let its contents spill out.  

Yet when we are emptied, then what do we do?  How can we fill ourselves?  How can we know what we need to fill us in a healthy way?  How can we nourish ourselves?  How can we provide the source of our own life?  

Instead of trying to fill ourselves, we can sit and wait.  We can practice patience.  We can develop the skill of sitting still.  We can learn to be silent.  We could listen instead of talking. We can try to be attentive to God.  

We embrace all of these difficult endeavors, they suddenly begin to happen, through the working of God's grace, when we're removed from the world.  If we give our consent, we give God free rein to work miracles in and through us.  Having stepped out of ourselves, God steps into us.  

Indeed, we have been extricated from our usual routines.  We have been given the blessing of being helped to step out of our maladaptive patterns.  

It wasn't until I quit my job as an attorney, accepted an invitation into the Peace Corps, moved to northern Morocco, and then went even deeper, moving into the Sahara Desert, that I had sufficiently departed from distractions to be able to consider a new way of being.  It was time.  
Sometimes we willingly choose to go into the desert.  The dry, arid expanse of the physical desert can be a good analogy for the metaphorical desert in which we feel deprived of all we had found so comforting.  

Yet if we stay where we are not challenged, how will we ever grow?  If we never step out of what is familiar to us, we will never step into the territory in which we find that we have been capable of more than we have ever been.  

Right now we have been picked up and dropped into a landscape where we have never been. How we will emerge from it is up to us.  Are we going to accept the invitation to become what we have never been, or stay right where we have always been?  

* Jeremiah 18:1-6